IVF: The End

September 2020 my husband and I return to NY for cycle day 1 (first day of my period). Back to the doctor, back to the tests, back to the medications. After about three weeks, I was ready for implantation. Walked over to the hospital Sunday morning. Checked in. Changed into the sterile hospital gown, mask and grippy socks.

It was a surreal experience. From the waiting room, looking around at the other women/ couples, wondering what their fertility problem was. All sitting in the same room with our uniforms on, called back one by one. To the procedure room itself, sitting on the table, legs up and open, with a photo of our little fertilized egg on the screen. After about 30 seconds it was over, I was being wheeled out on the stretcher, with a postcard sized photo of my egg in hand.

Was I pregnant?
If the answer is yes, why did it feel so unnatural? When fertilization takes place outside of the hospital, in the bedroom, you are not be aware of it happening. You are taught to take a pregnancy test once you miss your period because your body needs time to develop detectable levels of HCG, so I am technically not pregnant.
If the answer is no, is it considered a miscarriage? The fertilized egg grew for five days before being put back in, so it is alive. A miscarriage is a loss of pregnancy before 20 weeks, and you begin counting from cycle day 1, so technically I would be three weeks along.

Knowing I had a fertilized egg inside me, I was confused. I did not know how to behave — as I am pregnant, and not drink, or eat certain foods, cut back on running; or do I continue normal life until I see a positive pregnancy test.

 Nevertheless, my first cycle of IVF was complete.
The first chapter of my infertility story comes to an end.
Let’s see what chapter two brings.

cbxo